The Other Day, I Accidently Kicked a Baby

So a few Sundays ago, when Bmoney and RR were in town, my roommates, Bmoney and I all went out to brunch. We were all tired and full when brunch was done and as we stood on the corner deciding what to do next, I realized I needed a good stretch. Welcome Back Lia had been the night before, and as usual, Bmoney and I had torn up the dance floor so my legs were a bit sore.

So as I’m standing on the corner, I’m looking to the right and I kick my left leg out to the left, an unusual move in and of itself, as normally, I don't kick my legs straight out to the side in order to stretch them. I bend down or whatever. So anyways, I kick my leg out, only I make contact with something when really all I should have felt was air. I look left. I see nothing. I look down. I see a toddler...looking at me...slightly startled, his Tootsie Roll Pop on the ground. My hands flew to my mouth. I had kicked a goddamn baby in the face.

My roommates stared. Bmoney stared. I stared. I looked at the mom. She was staring at me…not angrily (THANK GOD), as I hadn’t injured the baby, just kicked the lollipop straight from his mouth.

We all just continued staring when I finally was able to get out, "Oh My God. I am SOOOOOO sorry! I just KICKED your son."

The mom was like "It’s ok, you didn’t mean it."

I was like, "I just kicked your baby. Now he doesn't have a lollipop."

She laughed. I looked down again and it was actually the baby giving me the dirty look.

Hands still at my mouth, friends still silent in surprise, I continued to apologize. The mom said no problem again and their party continued on.

Once they were about ten steps away, we all collapsed in laughter. Turns out, it’s kind of funny to kick a baby in the face....as long as the baby doesn't get hurt.