Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Back in the Daily Grind

So…I’m back at work and surprisingly not as bitter about it as I expected. There were a few things that slipped off the radar before I left, and yes, I got called out about it, but what can you do. It sucks but this time it has rolled off my back much faster than it has in the past. There is only one of me and I only have so much time.

Anyways, I was in my first new business presentation this morning where I actually had a speaking role. I only had to present one slide and by the amount I practiced, you would think I was giving the whole damn presentation. But it went off without a hitch and I was told I did extremely well. So big pat on the back for me for my first time actually speaking at a presentation! It’s like being a doctor and performing surgery alone for the first time. In a way. Kind of. Okay, it’s not really the same, but it’s the same difference! I had to totally psych myself out by saying things like "Is this like giving the Presidential address? No. If you did give the Presidential address would you kick ass? Yes." and..."If you mess up, will anyone blow up, die or be injured in any way? No." And I guess that worked.

Tonight is the Christmas Tree lighting at Rockefeller Center and once again, I doubt I’ll be able to make it. I’ve slowly come to learn that to do anything fun in New York, it’s probably better not to live here. You have to come on vacation. Work is holding me back from all the good times, with the exception of 6th street Indian Food and beer! Oh the irony!

The next few weeks promise to be very busy, with multiple Christmas parties, including my own for work. I love Christmas parties. It’s the only time of year I get to play a little game I like to call, “Whose Going to Make a Complete Asshole Out of Themselves This Year.” I make internal bets and then see if I won. Best. Game. Ever.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Back and in Full Effect

After a two week hiatus (my fingers get tired you know) LiaLia is back, rested and in full effect!

Normally, I don’t like to get introspective on here. I like to make it seem as if my life is nothing but fun and games, getting annoyed during work, shameless self-absorption, drinking alcohol and non-stop good times. And most of the time, that’s pretty true. However, the last two weeks have been among the most interesting of my life- from my first trip to Europe to a re-examination of all those close to me. My week in Europe was filled with adventure, fun, introspection, nervousness, sadness, excitement and intrigue. My week in sunny Boca Raton was filled with all that and more. Go fucking figure!! I learned more about my family and friends this particular week than I thought I ever could. More on that to come b/c let’s face it, my realizations about life are not why people read this. However, I’m excited for the upcoming holidays and new year. By all appearances, if I thought 2005 was busy, 2006 should be off the chain!

Back on the Clock - goddamit

I’m back to work tomorrow for the first time in like 16 days and I’m somewhat excited about it. I’m sure that by tomorrow afternoon, roughly around this time, I’ll be f*ing stressed out and pissed off, but right here, at this moment, I am looking forward to getting back into the daily grind. Although, the ideal life would be going to brunch, the beach, Starbucks and to bars like I have been doing the last few days. Gotta keep cracking on my book to make that dream a reality! Yay for a college education and feminine advancement! This is what my new aspirations consist of.

Anyways, I’m off to the scrapbooking store to load up on crap for the scrapbook I have not yet started, even though I bought it like two years ago.

Peace out til tomorrow when I’m back up in the NY to tha C.

Friday, November 11, 2005

It's E-Day!

This is my version of D-Day, where instead of D for Doom or whatever it was meant for, I change it to E for Europe. The day has arrived and if I don't say so myself, I have been the model in efficiency of planning and emergency preparedness! I have a towel, blowdryer, snacks, nightclub clothes, bar clothes, sightseeing clothes, makeup, jewelry, scarves and toiletries to handle any whim that we may have.

Now, if I can just sleep on the plane, I'll be good to go!

New Years, Part Two

Gil is now included in my Happy New Year's festivities. Gil, welcome aboard! Ya'll this boy can dance, which we heart. And, he is fun. He uses curse words with regularity and can drink better than anyone. The perfect addition!

E-mail Blasts
If you'd like to be included on the e-mail blasts my co-workers demanded, leave a comment saying so. It's like blogs on the go. I need your e-mail address though. If you think I'm Carrie Bradshaw here in New York, lawd you know nothing yet.

Ok so much work to get done so until next week when I can recount my trip in its entirety, I bid you cheerio.


Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Dr. Widget

So I work with this vendor from time to time, we'll call him Dr. Widget, who goes on television shows and discusses our clients. I don't really work with him directly, my supervisor does more of the wheeling and dealing, but ever since we've begun work with him, something has bothered me tremendously.

Dr. Widget is his stage name. In real life, he has a regular name, let's just say its Tom Smith. When he calls, do you know what he introduces himself as? Dr. Widget. Signs his emails as Dr. Widget. Asks his mail to be addressed to Dr. Widget. I only take issue with one tiny thing - Dr. Widget is NOT A DOCTOR.

I refuse to address him as Dr. anything. When he calls I say Hello, Tom. When I email its Dear Tom. And when I send packages its to Mr. Tom Smith.

But he refuses to call himself otherwise. I am not sure if he knows we are locked in a battle that neither one of us refuses to back down from. Perhaps in real life, his neighbors and local grocery store clerk call him Dr. Widget and I'm the only one who takes extreme offense. NOT ON MY WATCH PAL!!!

If I began to choke on a piece of fruit in front of Dr. Widget, would he be able to do the Heimlich Maneuver and save my life?

If I was to require an emergency trachaeotomy because my windpipe had been crushed, could Dr. Widget perform this medical surgery?

If I broke my leg in a horrific cycling accident, would Dr. Widget know the first thing to do?

NO HE WOULDN'T BECAUSE HE'S NOT A DOCTOR.

How starved are you for attention and how big of a DORK must you be, that you actually have to tout yourself as a doctor, when you're not??

Hey, I have an idea...everyone just start calling me Officer Lia because you know what? I'd like to be a police officer. I just don't want to go to the Police Academy for training. Or wear a uniform, carry a gun and be responsible for the protection and well-being of my fellow citizens. I just think people would think more highly of me as Officer Lia.

Or better yet, call me Professor Lia. Only I don't teach anything, work in academia or publish in journals. I just like the way it sounds.

I hope one day he does get in the situation where he can't help anyone because he has no medical training. And they say, but aren't you Dr. Widget? And he has to say, No! I'm just Tom Smith! Maybe then he'll stop.

Days Until Europe- 2

So last night I bought the most beautiful Jansport BackPack as a symbol of all the world traveling yet to come. Compliments of Mom and Dad for my birthday.

Tonight's mission is to finalize my packing list and prepare for my final load of laundry. Can't wait for tomorrow, when its T-minus-One and counting.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

* Note, I meant to post this yesterday, but forgot to press publish!

Mexican Food


I've come to terms with the fact that most of this blog deals with food and my obsession with it. Every once in a while, I throw in a story about this or that, but somewhere or another, I usually wind up discussing my various gastronomic adventures. But I'm cool with that and so it shall remain. In ten years I may very well be blogging about my adventures with Jenny Craig and the Weight Watchers crew, but for now, while I'm young, carefree and in complete disregard of my everlasting health. I work out- and I'd like to think that for every bite that goes into my mouth, I negate it on the treadmill. I'll never have a six pack, but I'll never have a gut. And that's fine by me.

Last night, because I knew I was in for the long-haul at work, I ordered myself guacamole and a chicken enchilada. And they were delicious. But not as delicious as they are today because Mexican food is always better the second day. Why is that? No other food, in my experience, is better the second time around. Chinese is kind of...but it's a very distant second to Mexican. It's possibly one of the great mysteries of the world.

Days Until L & P's European Adventure- Four

On today's to-do list is confirm why my hostel has not yet confirmed my reservation. I know they are working on it, because if they are not, I'll die.

Buy a backpack- to symbolize the beginning of all the world traveling I'm going to do!

New Years

Just found out Maria and JC will be in New York for New Year's!!! New Year's is normally my very LEAST favorite holiday, I've never had a fun one. I had one once that was almost fun, until I got belligerently drunk and challenged a ginormous girl to a fight. Which she accepted and then I ran away. So that means now Olivia, Maria, JC, Annette and I, possibly Nick will all be together which is a recipe for success! More than likely Annette and I will wind up having to kiss one another (haha, hand-over-mouth-Hollywood-style of course) but hey, that's okay as long as its all in the name of a good time!

Monday, November 07, 2005

Big Thanks

A big huge thank you to everyone who showed up for LiaPalooza 2005, my semi-surprise birthday party. It meant a lot to me that you took the time out to show up and celebrate my birth! Love to all.

Countdown to Lia's Third Trip Out of the United States, not on a Cruise Ship

It's hard to believe that in almost, nearly 25 years on Planet Earth, I have not yet seen the pyramids of Egypt, the Great Wall of China or the Dead Sea...or any other of the seven wonders of the world. I did make a Life's To-Do list when I was seven because I read everyone should do so in Reader's Digest. Oh what I wouldn't give to know where that list is today. Besides those big dreams, it probably included stuff like owning a Power Wheel and meeting Rainbow Brite (oh wait, I did do that in the San Diego Zoo- hahahahaha, I was so nerdy and cool!)

Anyways, I move one step closer to having personal knowledge of international things THIS FRIDAY!!! I've waited my whole life to go to Europe and NOW I AM GOING!!!! I wasn't excited up until this point, only because I felt it was so far away and I hadn't planned anything yet. But the majority of my weekend was spent booking hostels and planning itineraries- and now it's real. My first times out of the US were on cruise ships...and that so doesn't count because you don't even need your passport to get off the boat. Que boring. My second, official trip out of the US was to Caracas, Venezuela earlier this year. And that was SUPER awesome. But my dream has always been to go to Europe and isn't the third time the charm? London is destination numero uno. And land of my ancestors (and explanation for my love of corned beef and beer)- Dublin- is destination numero dos.

More on this later, as I can't actually go on vacation if I don't do any work today. Lates!



Friday, November 04, 2005

If I Had To Be Anyone Other Than Myself

I’ve often wondered…if I had to choose to be someone else on Earth for just one day…who would I be?

Would I be an anonymous rich person and just go blow a bunch of cash and have the best day ever? Starting in a hot air balloon over Greek islands and ending with dinner on top of the Eiffel tower?

Would I be a celebrity so that just for one day I could experience everyone in the world knowing my name?

Would I be a famous person from history so that I could live out something that changed the world? Like my homie Abe Lincoln giving the Emancipation Proclamation or something like that?

Maybe one of the above, maybe none of the above. How could you choose? I never knew if I could..until…my coworker sent me to a Web site.

www.tuckermax.com. It changed my life.

Tucker Max is from Boca (like me). His family owns Max’s Grille, my FAVORITE happy hour spot in South Florida. I spent many a middle school night outside the Max’s Grille in Mizner Park waiting to be old enough to go inside. Some of you may have even been there with me, pulling stunts to pass the time.

Tucker Max is a man whore- and although I wouldn’t want to be a whore in this life or anyone else’s life….if you are going to be a whore you might as well be funny about it. And he is beyond funny- he’s hilarious.

I think, as a wannabe writer, it’s super hard to be funny in the printed word. TUCKER MAX IS A GENIUS. If I have one-tenth of the adventure he has (and you all know I’m working on it) I’ll be a happy camper.

Anyway- check it out- the one person I would be if I could be anyone else. www.tuckermax.com.

Speaking of adventure, be looking forward to the post-weekend blog and I’m sure you all know why.

Peace!

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Worst Two Days Ever

Only those of you out there who are in the same line of work as me will truly understand my distress about the following. Yesterday I had it all planned out to leave by 6 (wayyyy early for me), go to the gym, eat dinner and get in bed by 10 with my new book- The Alchemist. Even though I bought the ENTIRE works of Jane Austen, for some reason I’m not as excited to read them as I was when I was feeling high-minded on BarnesandNoble.com.

Anyway, at almost 5 p.m. on the dot, our client calls to tell us she’ll be in town tomorrow and wants to meet at 9:30! AM!!! Not only did I have to finish a release that had been sitting at my desk to be finished, but I had to update our activity grid, create the folders for the meeting, rush to find the assistant to set up breakfast. Que horrific!!

On the way home, we jump into a taxi who has NO idea how to get cross town through the Halloween parade (and if you think NY has freaks on a normal day, you’ve obviously never been propositioned by a 300-pound Fanta “Girl” in NYC on Halloween). We jump out one half hour and one block later, and we weren’t going to pay but then the guilt got the best of me and I threw him $4. It’s not his fault he’s AN IDIOT. Anyways, then I had to walk THROUGH the parade crowds to get to the subway. Horrible. Such WIERDOS! I still made it to the gym, but it was 8:30. Not only that but my iPod wouldn’t turn on –HORROR OF ALL HORRORS IT’S BRAND NEW, I was starving and my timetable was totally thrown off.

Instead of being in bed at 10, I was in bed at midnight, but not before I had totally wasted my time playing Snood instead of cooking a real dinner, instead I had a bag of edamame…again. I forgot I had taped Grey’s Anatomy and totally wasted my time watching something I don’t remember. Ugh! How could I forget?? Dr. Alex- I heart you! Then, P. came home with her brother looking to watch Chapelle’s show and it’s like Red Balls to me…Shazaam! I just have to watch. She also brought home ice cream. Peanut Butter. I couldn’t resist splitting it with her. And I just realized A. left me a Princess Leia (haha, get it?) cupcake which I ate too. Thank God I went to the gym to negate everything I did after I left!

Anyways, I hate it when I have my night planned and then it totally goes wrong! I did everything right!!!

I then woke up on Tuesday, super early, because of aforementioned client meeting. Got to work, started the meeting and everything was going a-okay until I realized I was going to be totally sick. So I ran to the bathroom, puked up my breakfast, grabbed a breath mint and went back to the meeting. Ten minutes later, same thing. I saw it through to the end and then got sent home. Of course, traffic was horrible and I was stuck in the cab for like 45 minutes trying not to get sick all over the place. I finally made it home, c crashed on my couch watching the E! True Hollywood Story of Goldie Hawn and Kate Hudson- and I got totally depressed b/c their lives are so freaking awesome.

Anyways, I finally gathered the strength to eat something (guacamole, natch) and then I passed out again. I woke up and went to the gym to get my blood flowing. My gym boyfriend was there- hooray! I then went home, attempted to watch Grey’s Anatomy except, due to the oldness of our TV, when we put the show on mute so we could go to sleep- the TAPE MUTED TOO. DOES ANYONE OUT THERE HAVE THIS TAPED???? PLEASE SEND IT TO APARTMENT 5C WE ARE DYING!!!!!!!

Then P. and A. had to do something para mi cumpleanos, entonces, I went to my room to read the Alchemist- which is awesome thus far! As a matter of fact, I made it three quarters of the way through the book in an hour. It’s not very long. I attempted to go to sleep around 10 but didn’t fall asleep until like 11:30 b/c the temperature in my room was neither hot nor cold and I couldn’t get comfortable. Not even one leg out of the blanket worked- my usual trick! Instead, I was half wrapped in my comforter, half not. It was horrible.

Then, in the middle of the night I woke up and my throat was on fire. Worst night’s sleep ever!!!!

Today, needless to say, I am slightly cranky. :(